What a Drag
by obsidians
Summary: Mousse makes an unusual discovery in a gay bar. This could be the start of a beautiful friendship. Lemonless, Mousse/Ranma friendship, not a pairing. No yaoi.
1. Chapter 1

I do not own Ranma ½ or its characters; Rumiko Takahashi does and I make no money from writing this story.

Mousse smiled in greeting at the two men who entered the Neko Hanten, who promptly sat in his section. They were his favourite customers who not only were like friends to him, but were generous with their tips. They had met in the café quite by accident a year before and had been a loving couple ever since. Toshi was a criminal lawyer at the peak of his career and Kenji was a doctor, they both shared good looks, favourable health and success in life while in their mid thirties. "Hey fellas, will you be having your usual?" he asked the kindly gay couple.

"Of course hottie, two of the usual and one of you to go" Toshi replied, he liked to pretend to hit on Mousse and Mousse didn't mind.

"Now, now Toshi what would Shampoo think if I left with you?" Mousse teased back.

"Shampoo not care" came a voice from behind him and Shampoo left with a toss of her hair to serve her next customer. Mousse blushed at this while both men broke into good natured laughter, which even he joined in.

"I tell you Mousse, you should give up on her and find yourself a nice guy" Kenji suggested, giving his partner a loving look.

Mousse felt a stab of envy at the obvious true love they shared, "that would be a fine idea, if I liked men" he said.

"How could you pass this up?" Toshi asked while he batted his eyelashes playfully at the Chinese martial artist.

"Easily, you're far too hairy for my liking" Mousse replied rolling his eyes.

Toshi actually looked hurt for a second "You're just hairy enough for me" his partner assured him and then turned to Mousse. "We have an announcement to make; we're getting married. Would like you to come to our wedding?"

"Oh? I didn't know that gay marriage was legal in Japan" Mousse said.

"It's not, so it'll be more like a big party where we will be exchanging vows, please say you'll come. You're the reason why we met in the first place" Toshi said and it was true. They had both come into the Neko Hanten on a particularly busy day. Having only one table left and the two of them being alone, Mousse had asked them if they would mind sharing it. They had accepted and had been together ever since.

Mousse wasn't disturbed by anyone else's sexuality and was secure in his own (lack of it, that is) "I would love to come" he replied.

"Great, wear something sexy" Toshi said.

Mousse looked down at his usual white robe, belt and pants combination "sexier than this?" he teased.

"Very much so, I don't see why you straight boys always hide your light under a bushel basket" Toshi said sourly.

Mousse raised his eyebrows at his friend "let's just say that I prefer my package to remain a mystery to be unwrapped by the right person on our wedding night"

Kenji regarded the haughty Amazon girl flirting with Ranma "If you're waiting for that one, it's going to be pretty rusty by then" he observed.

"I have faith" Mousse said even though the scene disturbed him.

Toshi shook his head at partner "aren't you glad that we're not straight anymore? We could be just like Mousse" he teased and than they proceeded to fill Mousse in on their highly elaborate wedding details just to distract him.

Months Later

Mousse had been allowed to attend their mutual bachelor party by getting special permission from the bar owner, along with a promise that he wouldn't attempt to order anything containing alcohol. The happy couple had chosen to have this at a local gay bar that featured a drag show called Hags in Heels. The local drag community would pull on their best petticoats and entertain the masses by singing and bumping and grinding to a poppy beat. Mousse had never been to such an event and found it vastly entertaining while he drank iced tea at the table of honour. He had to admit that it was hard to believe that some of the talented performers were actually males, some of them looked so real. Both grooms wore top hats that read 'groom', these elicited many rounds of free drinks from the friendly gay community. They were rather blotto, it was a fun night.

The Mistress of Ceremonies stood up to announce the star performer, her name was Betty Blu and she was impersonating Lucille Ball in I Love Lucy that night. "I hope everyone's having fun and are hot for our featured performer, she currently holds the crown for our Miss Thing contest. Put your hands together for Raunchy Ranko" The stage went dark and a song that Mousse recognized came on. It was "He's a Dream" from the movie Flashdance. Shampoo had gone through a stage where she was in love with this film and had made Mousse watch it with her almost daily.

He watched in surprise as a black silhouette came out dancing in a baggy suit, just as Jennifer Beals had in the movie. Then she stripped down to a short, orange dress and move for move, copied the dance exactly. All Mousse could see when she took that off, was red lingerie, a highly believable voluptuously toned female body and flying red hair. This dancer was something special; he realized and waited for the water splash with bated breath. It came and they all applauded, but then something different happened, suddenly the person on stage had a muscular body, black hair and was obviously male. He grinned at them all, Mousse's eyes widened in recognition and his jaw dropped. Then the figure on stage grabbed a glass of water and threw that over his head, suddenly standing in his place was a beautiful, curvy petit red head who could have been his twin. She finished her dance and bowed when everyone started throwing yen at her, until the damp stage was covered with them. "Thank you so much" her familiar high, clear voice said. "I understand that we have a wedding party with us, I've prepared a special number for them, I just have to nip off and change" she said and then the curtains closed. Mousse imagined that she was quickly gathering up her tips and the stage about to be mopped.

"Isn't she something?" Toshi said puffing alcohol laced breath at Mousse.

"Oh that she certainly is" Mousse said, knowing full well who she was.

"It's hard to believe she's isn't a real woman, but the owner has seen the evidence with his own eyes" Kenji supplied.

Mousse looked up sharply at this "is she gay?" he asked. It was hard for him to picture Ranma being gay.

"No she likes girls, it was that she was too believable when she arrived here a year ago. So the owner smelled a rat, we can't have a real woman perform here; it's not fair to our girls. She volunteered to show him the proof in front of witnesses and sure enough, she's just another drag queen" Toshi said.

"Possibly" Mousse said mysteriously. He was looking forward to confronting the other martial artist to taunt him for his swishy ways. Ranko returned wearing a sparkly, red sequined gown that mimicked a Chinese dress. "Now if the happy couple would join us on the dance floor, I have a song I would like to dedicate to them" she said into the mike.

"Shall we?" Kenji said holding his hand out to Toshi.

"Of course my love" Toshi said and took his partners hand.

Ranma started to sing Cher's 'I saw a Man & He Danced with His Wife' Mousse had to admit that he was impressed, the background music was strictly instrumental, and Ranma was actually singing the song! Her sweet, high voice blended and reached each note perfectly. She sounded like a sweeter version of the normally throaty Cher as Toshi and Kenji held each other tightly while they danced in time with her song, until the last note faded. Then she went to hug and talk to them, they led her back to the table. She stopped short and seemed to go pale when she saw Mousse sitting there.

Mousse studied her, he'd never seen Ranma wearing glitter makeup, red stiletto heels and a tight gown before, but there was no doubt in his mind that this creature before him was the aqua transsexual martial artist he knew. The sheer look of panic on her face at Mousse's discovery gave her away.

Mousse just smirked and said "hello Ranma"


	2. Chapter 2

Ranma froze when a smirking Mousse said "hello Ranma." What the hell was he doing at a gay bar? She'd assumed that she was safe doing these performances because there was no way that anyone she knew was going to come here. It was a fairly small, insular community that didn't tend to advertise these events to the 'normal' population. Mousse stood up to tower over her smaller female form and said "I'm sorry Miss, did I mistake you for someone else?"

"Mousse you know Ranko?" the slightly confused Toshi asked.

"I believe we've met before, isn't that right?" Mousse said.

"I've never seen you before in my life!" Ranma snapped. "What the hell are you doing here!" she demanded.

"I'm confused, you've never met him before, yet you're asking him what he's doing here? We do allow breeders-ah, straight people into our bars. I'm sorry Ranko, but you're being a tad rude to our guest" Kenji reprimanded her.

Anger snapped in her eyes, she mock bowed to him "I'm sorry that I upset your-guest, I hope that you enjoyed your night Mr....."

"Mousse" he supplied. "Apology accepted, your show was most......enlightening, I shall be happy to pass on information about future performances to everyone I know. I'm sure you could always use more fans" he said giving her a warning look. The look she shot him back should have stopped his heart.

"I've got to go" she said abruptly, she bowed to Kenji and Toshi, "congratulations on your upcoming marriage" she said and turned on her absurdly tall heel. She walked away greeting fans on all sides.

"That was odd, wonder why she left like that? I promised her a tip" Toshi said.

"Perhaps she's not her usual self tonight?" Mousse suggested and laughed at his own joke, the rest laughed along out of sheer drunkenness, not quite getting the joke. They were just happy to see their friend in good spirits. It was only a few minutes before a young blonde 'girl' brought Mousse a note.

"Well look at that, we take you to a gay bar once and you're already receiving love letters" Toshi teased.

Mousse smiled back "I'm sure it's not like that at all" he replied as he opened the note and read it:

Mousse

I don't know that you're doing here, but we have to talk. Meet me at the ice cream shop called Life is Sweet in fifteen minutes.

Ranma

"It is an indecent proposal? I hope it is. You're wasted on the straight world" Toshi declared.

"It's not that sort of proposal and it certainly isn't indecent" Mousse retorted, then excused himself pleading exhaustion.

He arrived at the ice cream shop and was surprised to find Ranma still in costume, except she wore a pair of lower heels now. She raised her eyes to Mousse when he sat down and demanded "what the hell were you doing there tonight?"

"I was invited by the two grooms to their bachelor party. I know them from the Neko Hanten, they're my best customers" Mousse explained.

Ranma snorted in an unladylike way "figures" she said and then frowned and seemed lost in thought until she was interrupted by the waiter.

"Can I get you anything cutie?" he asked.

She suddenly was all cute and flirtatious "I would love to have one of your Super Duper Deluxe Happy Dappy Supreme Banana Splits, handsome. I want extra sprinkles but no nuts, I have to watch my girlish figure" she said and smoothed her hand over her hip in a suggestive manner. Even Mousse blushed at her display.

This caused the rather plain waiter to get a nosebleed, Mousse promptly handed him a tissue. "I'll just have a bowl of vanilla ice cream and a glass of water" he said.

"Sure, sure" the waiter said still frozen in place staring at Ranma, who was now chewing on a straw in a cute way.

"Could you please go get our orders?" Mousse requested through gritted teeth.

This seemed to snap him out of it "I'm sorry, is she your girlfriend?" he apologized hastily. This caused Ranma to giggle.

Mousse turned so bright red that he was surprised his brains didn't cook in his head. "NO!" he cried. The waiter quickly left and took refuge behind in counter to begin putting their orders together.

When Ranma had stopped snickering, she looked deadly serious and said "how much?"

"How much what?" Mousse asked confused, he'd just wanted to threaten to tell people and gloat about her secret life. Ranma the drag queen, it was priceless!

"How much money do I have to pay you to keep your mouth shut?" she said narrowing her eyes at him.

"Not a dime. If you want to make a fool of yourself and sashay your butt on stage, go right a head. I just want you to stay away from my girl" he said, thinking that he might be able to use this to his advantage after all.

Ranma's face went as red as her hair and she exploded "Why don't you tell her to stay away from me! You think I enjoy it, girls always chasing me, being told who I have to marry and guys chasing after me because the girl they adore is trying to marry me. It's a never ending cycle. It gets old and I hate it!"

Mousse was stunned, he'd never thought about Ranma's prospective before and reflected on Shampoo's behaviour, it was true it was her who sought him out and rubbed herself all over him. "Even still...." he began only to be interrupted.

"Even still what? Have you ever been treated like you're just a trophy to be won and your feelings don't matter? Heck the Amazons want me because of a stupid law that doesn't even apply to me. Ukyou wants me to open a restaurant with her and I know diddly squat about making okonomiyaki, except how to eat it. Kodachi probably wants to keep me in a cage or something and the only girl I actually like wants to send me into orbit with her mallet every two seconds for being jealous of the rest of the girls" she snapped and then slapped her hand across her mouth for what she'd just admitted to Mousse.

"So you like Akane, why her?" Mousse asked intrigued, he'd been aware that Ranma seemed to favour Akane, but hadn't been sure of the extent of his feelings.

"Why Shampoo? She humiliates you, she rejects you and she abuses you. Have you even kissed her yet?" Ranma demanded, Mousse's slow, painful blush answered that question.

"Have you ever kissed Akane?" he demanded back.

Now it was Ranma's turn to blush "once when I went Neko" she said softly.

"So you've never........?" Mousse asked.

"Pure as the driven snow" Ranma said with a sigh. "You?"

"I've spent thirteen years chasing the same woman and haven't even gotten to kiss her. Do the math" Mousse replied. "Do you think that the other guys we know are to?"

Suddenly the tension went out of Ranma "Ryoga's got to be, he gets a nosebleed when he sees me naked!" she said with a giggle.

"How about Kuno?" Mousse asked.

Both of them pictured the bokken wielding weirdo kendoists and cracked up "definitely!" they both agreed at the same time, and then shared a laugh again. The waiter set Mousse's water and ice cream down in front of him and then returned struggling under Ranma's order. Mousse's jaw dropped when the table almost collapsed beneath it. It seemed to be served in a bathtub and had mounds of ice cream the size of bowling balls that were all colours of the rainbow. These have rivers of sauce flowing over them and peeled bananas jutted everywhere. Sprinkles of all descriptions flowed down the sauces, these played with the gumbi bears and cherries and the whole confection was topped with lit sparklers. "Oh boy just in time, I'm starving" Ranma declared and proceeded to attack the obscenely huge sundae until not a drop remained. Mousse's own ice cream melted, he was too stunned at how fast she could eat. It was like witnessing a shark attack. "Man I needed that" she said rubbing her belly.

Mousse shook himself out of his revere and said "Ranma, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?"

"Not at all" she replied, daintily licking ice cream from her lipsticked mouth.

"How did you end up doing drag shows? I mean you're obviously not gay. Is it some sort of fetish?" Mousse asked.

Ranma frowned "Nabiki Tendo" she replied.

"Huh?" Mousse asked intelligently, this wasn't the sort of answer he was expecting.

"I'm in debt to her up to my eyeballs and have to make her payments or she said she was going to start selling dates with me to my fiancées. Akane would kill me" she said with her eyes wide with terror. "I wasn't making enough waitressing, so I became desperate. I was talking with Konatsu and he told me that he supplemented his income by performing in drag shows. He said that if they like your act and you're believable, you can make a lot in tips. He suggested that with my curse I could make a ton of money and he could hook me up with gigs for a percentage of it. I agreed and I borrowed some clothes from him. With some coaching, I tried it and we realized that I'm a natural. By doing martial arts all my life, I'm light on my feet and pick up dance moves easily, and then it turned out I could sing. I used to do this strictly for the money, and then I realized that I enjoyed it. I feel accepted within this community, people are friendly and no one tells me what to do, so I can relax" she explained.

Mousse nodded, he did understand the need to feel that Ranma fit in somewhere. Mousse certainly didn't seem to "I see what you mean and promise to keep your secret" he said.

Ranma heart leapt with joy "thanks Mousse, you really are a nice guy" she said and beamed at him.

"Will there be anything else?" the waiter asked staring at Ranma again; she dimpled a smile at him in response.

"Nothing for me cutie" she said.

"Just the bill" Mousse said.

"No problem, that will be 200 yen for your ice cream sir and yours is on the house because you're so cute" he said to Ranma giving her a smitten look.

She actually squealed and clapped her hands "gosh thanks mister" she gushed and did a hypnotic wiggle that almost caused another nosebleed in the poor, naïve young boy.

Mousse just sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Is that why you're still in your female form and dressed like this?" he asked when he'd left.

"Yes, I work up an appetite dancing and like to be treated to snacks. Why do you think that there's something wrong with me performing as a drag queen?" she asked.

"It seems a little dishonest" Mousse said. "After all, you become a real woman while all the rest of the drag queens have to work at it"

Ranma frowned, "it's not like I have a choice, I need to make the payments. Nabiki's my agent now, so I have to give both Konatsu and her a cut of my nightly earning. I try to supplement my income by winning as many drag pageants as I can to get prize money, that's where the real bucks lie. I've won three so far and hope to take Miss U-haul next month" she said.

"Miss U-haul?" Mousse questioned.

"It's the biggest drag contest in all of Japan, U-haul, drag, you get it?" she asked.

"Oh like the American company that rents those trucks? That's kind of clever" Mousse said. "Well if what I saw tonight was any indication, you're going to win"

"Tonight was nothing; I'm really going to need a gimmick to beat out all the rest. People go all out for this thing. Even half of the prize money would be enough to pay Nabiki off for once and for all" she moaned.

Mousse took off his glasses to polish them "good luck" he said as he stared absently towards the red blur.

Ranma was suddenly struck with just how handsome, no beautiful Mousse was. With his alabaster skin and perfectly symmetrical features, he looked like an angel. His vivid emerald eyes were large and heavily lashed, while his elegant black brow curved like raven's wings. Then there was all that silky, black hair that cascaded down his back like an ebony waterfall. Ranma noticed all this not in a sexual way, but a professional way. Mousse was prettier then most girls Ranma knew and would make a perfect drag queen. Mousse could be his gimmick, a fresh face on an old scene to be launched into the world that Ranma had embraced.

"Mousse you're what I need! Stick you in a dress, create an act for us and we're sure to take first place! Oh please say you'll perform at Miss U-haul with me?" she begged and affected the face that normally persuaded men to do things for her.

Mousse just went even paler and squeaked "me?"


	3. Chapter 3

"Please say yes" Ranma begged the dazed young man.

"I-I can't, I'm not that type of a guy" Mousse stammered, he could feel himself blushing at the idea.

"I'm not either, I do it for money and for fun" she pointed out. "With your looks, you'd be a natural" she said.

Mousse blushed at this again; he had the unsettling image of himself dressed up as a girl "there's no way" he cried, startling the waiter.

"I would split the prize money with you" she said persuasively, and then she told him the sum. He blanched at this, it was more then he made in a year. He considered for a few seconds. "No" he said definitely and went to leave.

"Then there is the basket of comps" she said.

"What are comps?" Mousse asked.

"Complimentary stuff that merchants and resorts donate to the contest intended for the winner" she said. "It usually includes a weekend for two at an expensive resort, dinner at a nice restaurant, make up, watches, jewelry, perfume, cameras, spa dates for mani, pedis and massages etc." she said.

"I have no interest in most of those things" he said.

"Hum, wonder if there's anyone you can give those to?" Ranma asked facetiously.

Mousse stopped and started to think about lying on a beach with Shampoo being waited on hand and foot at a resort, then going to their room and.......he quickly quashed that idea for fear of a nosebleed, of going on dates with her to a nice restaurant and finally her reaction to being given presents. Suddenly he saw that this might be the way to her heart.

"I'd give you first pick" she offered, she could see the wheels turning in his head.

"It would just be the once?" Mousse asked hesitantly.

"Yes, we would dress you up to the point that your own mother won't recognize you" Ranma said, she knew that she had him hooked.

"You wouldn't tell anyone?" he asked her.

"I promise on my honour as a martial artist" she said solemnly.

"Okay I'm in, what do we do now?" Mousse asked.

"We go see Konatsu to get his opinion, he's sure to approve of you" Ranma said. "Partners" she said sticking out her hand.

"Partners" Mousse said somewhat reluctantly.

The Next Day

"I don't know if this is going to work" Konatsu said walking around Mousse, he felt overly exposed because he wore only his pants. Where as Konatsu wore an elaborate, floral kimono and looked to all the world like a beautiful young woman.

"Why not?" asked the now male Ranma. "He's really pretty and slim like a female model" he pointed out.

Mousse bristled at being called pretty "hey" he protested. Konatsu silence him with a look.

"He's kind of muscular to pull it off and his shoulders are too wide, not to mention his butt is kind of small" he said giving the offending part of Mousse a pat, this caused his face to turn flame red and him to jump.

"Please don't touch me" he requested.

"Sorry, used to working with queens, they're pretty touchy feely" Konatsu explained.

"I'm not one" Mousse declared. "Ranma this in never going to work"

Konatsu raised a hand "I didn't say that, I'm willing to give it a try but you're going to have to work at it. You stick a guy in a dress and all you have is a guy in a dress, perfect for Halloween but not for an important contest. It's all about illusion to be convincing; you want to be a drag queen, not just a drag. Are you willing to give this miracle the same amount of dedication as your martial arts?" he asked him.

Mousse sighed and promised "I'll do whatever it takes"

"That's the spirit!" Ranma said.

"You're going to have to learn to be a girl, to talk like one and to walk like one. Is that understood?" Konatsu said with all the conviction of a drill sergeant. "He's going to need panties padded at the hips and bum, not to mention breast forms, good sized ones to balance out his pecs and shoulders" he observed to Ranma. "We'll need to do something about those glasses, they have to go. I think a trip to Mimi Meow's shop is in order"

"Who's Mimi Meow?" Mousse asked.

Mimi turned out to be an optometrist.

"Mousse this is Mimi Meow or Stanley Goldberg in real life. She may be a gaijin, but she can light up a stage with the best of them.

Mousse looked at the slim mid-forties man; he was rather plain and had a salt and pepper dark hair. He wore a plain grey button-down shirt and black slacks under his lab coat. Mousse didn't see how he would make a good drag queen. "Pleased to meet you" he said.

"This boy is pretty much blind, we want to see if it's possible to get him contacts" Konatsu explained. "These are what normally correct his vision" he said handing over the round coke bottle glasses distastefully.

Mimi blinked in surprise at them "are these a joke?" he asked Konatsu.

"I wish they were. Can anything be done?" he asked.

"I can issue him a white cane if he's really depends on these to see" Mimi joked, Mousse flinched at this. Mimi turned to Mousse, "step into my clinic and we'll see what we can do" Mousse let him run his tests and waited for the results with bated breath. He was excited about the idea of life without glasses; he'd longed to see a real optometrist but lacked the money in the past. "Well Mousse, I can honestly say that you have the worst eyesight that I've ever come across" Mimi declared.

"So I'm stuck with glasses forever?" he said with a sinking heart.

"No you can get contacts, but they would have to be hard gas permeable ones that you will have to clean every night. Disposable ones are out of the question.

"Really?" he said, his heart leapt with joy.

"That's wonderful!" Ranma declared.

"So when could I get them?" Mousse asked.

"They will be ready by next Tuesday, I'll ask the lab to put a rush on them" he said sensing the boy's excitement.

Then Mousse thought about the cost and his excitement died "how much for the visit here today and for them?" he asked hesitantly.

"The visit is free as us girls have to help each other out and the contacts are two thousand yen, you can pay for those in installments with a minimum down payment when you pick them up" he said sensing that Mousse was broke. He wanted to help him out.

"Thanks so much!" he cried and his new friends congratulated him.

"No problem, I just have to ask you to leave your contact information" Mimi said and led him inside his office. While Mousse was filling out the card he asked him "so you seemed dubious about my being a convincing drag queen?"

Mousse blushed at how obvious he was "sorry, I just can't picture you in drag" he apologized.

"It's okay; I can't be a lifestyle with my job. Not that I can't pull a little something off every day. If you ever saw me in full makeup, wig and a dress it would change your mind" he said.

"Pull a little something off?" Mousse questioned.

Mimi leaned closed and whispered into his ear "I'm wearing lavender lingerie under my clothes, I've been wearing women's underwear for years"

Mousse blushed at this confession "your wife doesn't mind?" he asked noticing his wedding ring.

Mimi looked amused "she picks out what I wear every day, she's likes it. Our children don't know" he explained.

"So you're not gay?" Mousse asked.

"Lot's of us aren't. Gender preference is optional when it comes to queening, some people make it their whole life and get the sex change operation and others are content doing subtle things when we're not performing" he explained. "I'll call you the second you're contacts are ready so that you can impress your girlfriend"

Mousse blushed "how did you know there was someone I like?" he asked.

Mimi laughed in amusement "I remember being your age, there were several people that I liked" he replied.

When he rejoined the others, Konatsu gave him a nod of approval. "Getting rid of the coke bottles was the first step in your becoming a queen, next are cosmetic changes. We'll make a queen of you yet" he declared.

A Week Later

"Mousse it time to open café" Shampoo called. She was surprise when he didn't run out his room and crash into the wall at her voice. Instead he walked sedately down the stairs and looked directly at her.

"Sure I'm ready" he said. This was his first full day wearing his contacts and he couldn't help admiring how beautiful she was.

She tried to put her finger what was different about him when he didn't mix up the orders once or spill them on people in his usual befubbled way. He wasn't wearing his glasses, but seemed to be able to see his costumers and was smiling at them more than usual. She didn't know that the compliments he was receiving on his improved appearance were flattering him and putting him in a good mood.

"Okay how Mousse see without glasses?" she demanded when she cornered him in the kitchen.

"I got contacts, I'll be wearing these from now on" he explained.

"Oh, that good idea. You always look better without glasses" she said, noticing as if for the first time what beautiful eyes he had. She had to admit that without his glasses on he was really handsome.

Mousse beamed at the first real compliment that she'd ever given him and felt warm inside. "Thanks Shampoo" he said and returned to work with a spring in his step.

Shampoo stared after him and wondered why he was trying to improve his appearance. 'Does he have a girlfriend?" she wondered, somehow that idea disturbed her.


	4. Chapter 4

"Ouch" Mousse yelped as Konatsu tore the cotton strip away from his eyebrow, and took half of his eyebrow with it.

"I don't see why this is necessary? I don't have bushy eyebrows" he grumped and then yelped again as the other one was done.

"Don't be such a baby, you have nice eyebrows for a man but they need a little shaping and defining for a woman. Now if you take a kick to the face and shake it off easily, you can certainly take a little plucking and waxing" Konatsu said and picked up her tweezers. Mousse's eyes watered as each offending hair was tweezed from him and wondered again if this was a good idea. He could see the female Ranma looking on and swore that she was smirking. "There, we're done" Konatsu announced and handed him a mirror. Again Mousse was surprised at the transformation; it was subtle but did frame his eyes better and gave him a look of nobility that he'd lacked before. The effect was unisexual and not extreme in the least. "I approve, now we just have to see about getting rid of the rest of the body hair when the time comes" Konatsu said with approval.

"W-what?" Mousse stammered.

"You're lucky that you don't have hair on your chest, but you'll have to at least shave your leg hair and armpits for the contest" Ranma explained.

"No way!" Mousse snapped.

She put a hand on his arm and said "it's not so bad; you wear long pants and a baggy top all the time. No one's going to be the wiser until it grows out. I know that it'll feel and look weird the first time that you do it, but it gets easier with time" she assured him.

"You shave?" Mousse asked.

She pulled up her pant leg and then undid some frogs to reveal smooth legs and pits, "I have to, I perform at least once a week. Akane found out about it, so I just told her that I do it to make myself more aerodynamic" she explained.

"She bought that?" Mousse asked.

"She lets me use her special lady's shaving cream and daisy razors" Ranma said with a blush, smiling at the memory.

"Ranma I'm not sure that I can do this" Mousse moaned.

"You'd better, lots of time and effort has been spent on you, girlfriend" Konatsu said with a frown, his hands on his lovely hips.

"I could never look like you" Mousse challenged.

"Of course you couldn't, what you see is years of effort. You can't make a silk purse out of a pig's ear. But as the army says; be all that you can be. We're going to make a woman out of you if it kills you. Think of it as being another form of martial arts that you have to master" Konatsu demanded.

"Please Mousse, its just one day out of your life" Ranma pleaded.

"Ranma what are you?" Konatsu demanded.

"I'm a woman" she replied automatically.

"She says that now, I had to train her from the ground up to even admit that. I would have her in the frilliest lingerie and she would still demand that she was a guy. Mind you it was easier working with someone that has a girl's body at his disposable. However, with a little effort on your part, you could be just as convincing. Are you willing to put yourself in my hands and allow me to become your sensei?" Konatsu demanded.

"I don't know" Mousse replied.

"Well you better decide now because Ranma thinks that she can't do this without you. If you want to leave, leave now" Konatsu ordered.

Mousse looked from the beautiful stern task mistress to Ranma's pleading eyes. He suddenly felt sorry for her that she was so convinced that he was necessary. Then he questioned why he felt sorry for Ranma. "Okay, but if things get too weird, then I'm out" he declared.

"Wonderful" Ranma said and clapped her hands.

"Great, than its time to get you properly dressed" Konatsu said and handed him a pair of black stay ups, a padded bra and panties with a built-in girdle, and what seemed to be a thong.

"What are these?" Mousse said faintly, feeling like he was getting in over his head.

"These give you the illusion of curves" Konatsu answered, indicating the padded bra "and this is your gaff, it smoothes out your unsightly bulges and makes you look feminine."

"Smoothes my what?" Mousse asked suspiciously. He soon found out when it felt like it was crushing his balls, while the panties nipped in his waist and padded out his rear and hips. He had had to blushingly ask for help doing up the bra and how to put the stay ups on. He blushed as Konatsu made his point his toe and pull them on a little at a time. He blushed even more when both 'women' made him stand in the middle of the room while they examined him critically. Mousse felt practically naked, except for the flesh coloured granny panties and bra.

"He looks better than I thought he would" Konatsu commented.

"I look like a fool" Mousse said staring distastefully at his padded body.

"A dress would help" Ranma said. "No one looks good in the base garments" she explained.

"Now for the moment of truth" Konatsu said and pulled out a black sheath dress, both of them helped him into it and stood back.

"Wow", Ranma said, "if I didn't know it was you, I would swear you are a real woman" he commented.

"Much better" Konatsu agreed. "Now before we let you see, its make up time" he said and dragged Mousse towards a chair and rolled out a bag. He began by making Mousse's face into a blank slate with a foundation that matched in own pale skin perfectly. Then added blush, eyeliner, mascara and then blended his eye shadow. Finally he applied lipstick with a soft brush and then lined his naturally pouty lips with matching lip liner, then stood back and admired his work. Taking up a comb, Konatsu combed Mousse's lustrous ink black hair until each strand lay perfectly flat on his back to brush his hips. "You have a wonderful face for makeup and your hair is perfect, you could easily wear it up or down. It's amazing that its so healthy for being so long, not a single split end or damage, it's a miracle" Konatsu commented.

"Mousse you look amazing" Ranma said in awe.

"Can I look now?" Mousse asked nervously.

"Sure" Ranma said and led him over to a full length mirror. Mousse gasped when he saw a beautiful, young girl staring back at him. Konatsu had worked wonders with his face, each feature was more defined and his eyes really stood out. He was almost as beautiful as Konatsu, he realized, though he could see that he still held himself like a male.

"You look beautiful, we're going to knock them dead" Ranma gushed.

"Have you chosen your Queen name yet?" Konatsu asked.

"Shampoo" Mousse said without hesitation.

""Good name" he said with approval, ignoring Ranma's groan. "We still have a ways to go before we can determine if you can pass. You still have to be taught to walk in stilettos, which is the most difficult part" Konatsu pointed out.

Mousse looked at Konatsu own platform stilettos and shuddered, yet the other martial artist seemed perfectly comfortable in them as if he was wearing his slippers.

"Do I have to wear those?" he asked.

"Being a drag queen means not only being a woman, but being an uber woman. Of course you must, no respectable queen would be caught dead in flats" Konatsu snapped. "But we'll work on that another day. Now is the time to develop your S.A., or sex appeal. Now give me a sexy smile" he commanded Mousse. Mousse did so in a way that he hoped was sexy. "I said look sexy, not sick" Konatsu chided. "Just pretend that you're in bed with your honey bunny making love and smile" he advised.

"Ah Konatsu....." Ranma tried to intervene, but it was too late, Mousse had gotten a nosebleed.

"Another virgin" Konatsu stated with a roll of his eyes. He put his hands on his hips and said "how is it that a man with four fiancées and a man who lives next door to his woman can still be virgins?" he asked them.

Both Mousse and Ranma blushed at this "I-it's just that Shampoo and I......" Mousse stammered. "Wait a minute why do I have to explain this to you? Aren't you a virgin too?" he demanded back.

Konatsu fixed the gaze on Mousse that he normally reserved for the truly stupid. "I've gotten tons of tail in my time" he replied.

"Males?" Ranma asked.

Now someone else earned this stare "Females, underneath my splendor I wear boxer shorts and am just as straight as you two" he said evenly.

"Girls go for that?" Mousse asked indicating the elaborate kimono he wore.

"Lots of girl find this look alluring. It takes the term closet lezzies to a whole new level. Just think, they get the best of both worlds, a skill female lover who can give it to them as a man" he explained. "Girls want to eat me alive"

"Really?" Mousse asked, he'd never experienced this phenomenon.

"Just you wait and see" Konatsu declared. "Now breaks over. Ranma, show Mousse how to do a sexy smile" Mousse found himself oddly aroused as Ranma turned a slow smile on him and end it by running his tongue along her bottom lip. "See that is what you have to learn how to do, now practice this until I'm satisfied" he ordered him.

Ranma could only stand back and watched Mousse transform, he was coming along faster then Ranma would have thought and should be ready for the pageant. His smile wasn't as confident as Ranma would have liked; it was more sweet and endearing. But that wasn't a bad thing perhaps, all drag queens had their own personalities and if Mousse's was inner sweetness, than perhaps the judges would respond to this. Ranma still wasn't attracted to him, but he was starting to like him as a friend and suspected that they would have become that long before now, if not for Shampoo. He was a friendly, decent guy. Ranma wondered if he could help get Mousse together with Shampoo, if only to clear his path to Akane. Akane, he felt like he was forgetting something about tonight. He forced that his mind and made himself pay attention. Finally Mousse produced a smile that was sexy and heartbreakingly sweet at the same time.

"That's perfect" Ranma said.

"Yes, we have ourselves a winner, if he can do it again" Konatsu said.

"I think I can" Mousse said, and then used the trick that he'd just tried. He thought about the day that he and Shampoo had been trapped in the forest and it started to rain. They'd still been pretty young then, about twelve. They'd taken shelter in a cave and Shampoo, who was afraid of thunder, had huddled into his arms until she went to sleep. It had been the best experience in his life. He smiled at the memory again.

"Okay I think that we're done enough for today, we'll meet up tomorrow" Konatsu suggested. "Besides I have a date tonight" he said with a completely masculine grin, leaving no doubt in their minds as to his gender preferences.

Mousse sighed to be wearing his real clothes and to have removed his make up, while Ranma changed sexes with hot water. He and Ranma exited Konatsu's apartment (A/N yes I know that he lives with Ukyou. I needed the boys to have a place they can dress up without being discovered) "Where are you going Mousse?" Ranma asked.

"Back to the Neko Hanten" he replied.

"Would you like to come to the Tendo house for some tea?" Ranma asked, he sensed the other boy seemed kind of lonely. Mousse paused; he wasn't sure why his enemy wanted to spend time with him. He looked into his eyes seeking motive, but they were clear blue and guileless.

"That would be nice" he said and let Ranma lead the way. Both gasped when they realized that the house was surrounded by men clutching gifts.

Ranma wretched the nearest one around "what's the meaning of this?" he demanded.

"It's Akane's birthday" the other boy answered. Mousse saw Ranma go pale and thought he was going to faint.

"You forgot her birthday?" he observed, just at the same time he heard Akane calling "Ranma there you are? I thought you wouldn't make it in time for birthday cake" Suddenly she was standing in front of Ranma wearing a cute, yellow party dress.

"H-hi Akane" Ranma stammered, he was stunned by how cute she looked and knew he would say something piss her off. She made him nervous and he always put his foot in his mouth in her presence. "I just wanted to say......"

She giggled "you forgot my birthday huh? Don't worry about it" she said, just so happy to see him.

Mousse watched Ranma struggling and touched the roses and gift wrapped box that he'd secreted inside his sleeve. He'd intended them for Shampoo, but couldn't bear to watch someone suffer like this.

"He was trying to say that he hadn't forgotten. We just came back from shopping for your birthday. Happy birthday Akane" Mousse said as he handed her both objects.

"Shopping together?" Akane asked, a little surprised by this.

"Happenstance, we ran into each other" Mousse said, "right Ranma?" he asked the other stunned looking boy.

"Right" he agreed weakly and prayed there was nothing hentai inside the box. He was both relieved and embarrassed when it proved to be a beige teddy bear with red paws, a heart shaped nose with a red bow around its neck.

Akane squealed when she saw it and hugged it, "Ranma how did you remember I wanted this bear? I showed it to you months ago!" Ranma flushed and got tongue tied when she looked at him so adoringly with her clear brown eyes and gave him THAT smile.

"Ranma has a good memory" Mousse observed, sharing a look with him.

"Well either way, you've made my birthday wonderful" she declared and gave him a kiss on the cheek, Ranma turned even redder. She took his hand in hers, "come on let's get some cake" she suggested and led him inside, then paused. "Mousse we're having a small family party, would you care to join?" she asked, effectively dismissing her other would-be suitors.

"I would love to" he said as the others trudged away in defeat.

"Great! Where are your glasses?" she asked.

"Let me explain....." he said and did so. The night was fun for Mousse as he rarely ever socialized. Akane and Ranma bickered good-naturedly, but he could sense the closeness that lay beneath and envied them. He laughed at Happosai antics, did some tricks of his own for entertainment purposes, drank some sake with the fathers and helped Kasumi with the dishes. It was all over way too soon, and he excused him. Ranma walked him out.

"Why did you help me like that?" he whispered to him.

Mousse pondered this and came up with the best answer that he could. "We girls have to stick together" he replied, remembering what Mimi said.

"I owe you one" he said and glanced back to where Akane was sleepily hugging her teddy bear.

"I never forget a debt" Mousse said with a wolfish grin.

Shampoo had gotten worried when Mousse didn't come home, not that she'd admit that to herself. She sat the table waiting for him to appear like a frustrated spouse "stupid Mousse" she muttered for the umpteenth time that night, with visions of him lying in a ditch dead. She added the mental image of serving him in duck form at the restaurant to that. Finally she heard a key turn in the lock and soft footprints padding up the stairs.

"Mousse where you been?" she demanded leaping to her feet.

"Shampoo, what are you still doing up? You should have been in bed hours ago. My play rehearsal went overtime and some of us went for coffee afterwards" he explained. He'd chosen this as a cover story for his long hours spent away from home. He knew that she'd never check this or want to go see a play he was supposedly in anyway; she had little interest in what he did or where he went.

"I not be able to sleep" she lied.

"Should I make us come cocoa like I used to when you couldn't sleep?" he suggested.

"Thanks, I think I would like that" she said. She studied him as he went about making the homely smelling cocoa; he added extra sugar and several mini marshmallows for her without her having to ask. He sat opposite her; the dim lights of the kitchen made his face seem to glow ethereally and for him to look like an angel.

"Mousse?" she asked. He looked at her and gave her the smile that he'd been working on so hard that night; it was her smile after all.

She was struck again by how handsome he was. Why had she never realized that flecks of gold danced in his green eyes, that his smile could light up a room or that her childhood friend had become a man. A very desirable man. "Yes?" he questioned her. It was then she noticed that there was lipstick between the cracks in his lips.

"Why are you wearing lipstick?" she demanded.

He blushed painfully bright red "I had to kiss a girl in the first scene, she forgot to wear kiss-proof lipstick" he explained. Actually he had been wearing kiss-proof lipstick and being an amateur, he hadn't removed it correctly. "I think I'll go to bed" he said and hurriedly left. He was horridly embarrassed as he didn't want Shampoo to find out about his queening, she barely thought him a man as it was.

Shampoo stared after him and frowned, she didn't know which bothered her more; that he was seeing someone or that she could tell that he was lying to her.


	5. Chapter 5

Mousse woke up slowly, glad that he had the day off. It was his friend's wedding today and he had cleared this schedule change with Cologne so that he could attend.

The long hours spent dancing and being trained by two women (well technically a man and one half) on how to be a woman were killing him. He would normally leave for Konatsu's as soon as the restaurant closed and trudge home wearily in the wee small hours of the morning. Still it was paying off; he now could at least walk in stilettos without clinging to Ranma like a war victim and picked up the dances needed easily. He also looked good in the clothes if he did say so himself. In fact he'd started enjoying having a social life, if a slightly weirder one than most people. It felt good to have people call him and ask him to do things with them; it was something he hadn't experienced since leaving his tribe. His social life in Nerima consisted of: when Shampoo would begrudgingly agree to do something harmless with him, tribal business, challenges and occasionally banding together with the other martial artists to rescue Akane from another would-be suitor. This had become almost dully predictable.

Now not only did he have friends of a sort, but was routinely invited for dinner at the Tendo house during his Sundays off. He even felt different; he walked with more confidence thanks to Konatsu making him balance books on his head to practice poise. He'd abandoned the nervous half-run that he used to do around Shampoo. He'd received so many compliments on his improve appearance, that he'd started taking more pride in his looks. He felt dominate and manly, which was quite the opposite of what his lessons were supposed to achieve, but it seemed right for him.

Shampoo was acting odd; she seemed to be looking at him suspiciously whenever he left their place. He would often find her staring at him in contemplation as he more easily talked and even mildly flirted with cute girl customers, something he never used to do. His tips had improved a thousand fold. Then there was that time that a snotty, but beautiful _St_**. **_Hebereke_ student had stopped in for Ramen, she hadn't recognized him and had started flirting with him. He was just about to tell her that he was taken when Shampoo told her that she had to leave, weird.

Mousse pushed back the covers of his futon reluctantly and stood up, just then the door flew open.

"Mousse why are you in bed so late?" Shampoo demanded in Mandarin, and then frozen at the sight of him in a pair of frilly hot pink lace rhumba panties trimmed in black. "What are those?" she asked.

Mousse groaned and hung his head, he mentally punched Konatsu. "I pulled a muscle in my groin, so Dr. Tofu suggested that I wear these because they give me more support" he lied with his cheeks glowing.

"Dr. Tofu suggested those!" she said incredulously.

"Yes he did. Would you get out of here so I can get dressed?" he suggested hastily, yanking his pants on.

"Was that a bow on the front of them?" she asked.

"Definitely not" he said with a blush.

"What about the breakfast rush?" she asked.

"I have the day off to attend a wedding, you know that" he said.

"Oh I forgot" she said lamely. "Do you have a date?" she asked.

"Yes, I'm meeting her there. It's an all day affair" he explained.

Shampoo was kind of hurt that he hadn't asked her, but would never admit that to him. "I hope you have fun. Will you be home for dinner?" she asked.

He shrugged "not sure" he said evasively, he didn't want to admit to her that his date was Ranma. She was performing at the wedding and didn't want Akane to know about her double life anymore then Mousse did Shampoo, so it was decided that they would go together.

Shampoo was troubled by this discussion and sought Cologne out for advice. "Great-Grandmother, why would man wear girl panties?" she asked her.

Cologne seemed untroubled the question "the most logical answer is that he likes to cross dress" she said and tasted the Ramen she was making.

Shampoo thought about that and dismissed it. Mousse was many things, but a cross dress he wasn't, "any other reason why?" she asked.

Cologne paused and said "I've heard stories where young lovers exchange underwear in a kind of bonding ritual"

Shampoo only nodded, her worst fears confirmed. Mousse had found someone else to love; this disturbed her more than words could say.

Mousse pulled on his robe and went to the onsen to wash his face and brush his teeth and hair. He sighed and felt bad that he couldn't tell what Shampoo was going on, but didn't want to kill whatever slim chance he had with her. He smiled when he thought about what a lovely engagement ring he could buy her with the prize money. They were both ripe to marry and Ranma didn't want her, points in Mousse's favour. Just a few more weeks of being the other Shampoo, and then he could put this behind him forever.

Flashback to the Night Before

"You will wear these to bed each night until you get used to the feel of female underwear and here is a pair of stilettos, you will practice walking in them" Konatsu instructed.

"I have to wear female underwear to bed?" Mousse asked.

"Nothing like packing the junk in your trunk in silk" he said.

"What if anyone sees me in them?" Mousse asked.

"When was the last time Shampoo snuck into your room?" Konatsu asked.

"Never" responded Mousse.

"I think that you'll be safe" he concluded. He put on what he called grinding music and said "okay ladies show me how you can be sexy: Ranma lean over and wiggle your hips, Mousse stand behind her and grind against them" he ordered.

Mousse had gotten used to this, he took his position and ground against her full, lush buttocks. Of course Mousse being a virgin, it was only a matter of time before his body reacted to her now feminine curves.

Ranma froze when she felt something poking her butt "Please tell me that that is one of your hidden weapons and not what I think it is?" she questioned.

Mousse blushed, but said the first thing that came to mind "it's my ultimate hidden weapon" he said and ground it harder. Ranma blanched and then cracked up. The rest of the practice was pretty much shot as they spent it making jokes about taking it like a man and speculating whether Ranma would be if in girl form.

"Why do I have to work with virgins?" Konatsu sighed in exasperation.

End Flashback

Mousse took longer getting ready then usual, he didn't wear any make up but still took the time to put some spray laminate into his hair so that it would be extra shiny and then slipped into the tuxedo that Konatsu had leant him. He was lucky that he and the cross dressing martial artist were the same size and Konatsu generous with his clothes.

Konatsu had been astounded to find out that Mousse intended to wear his robe to the wedding. "It's a formal wedding, you should dress up!" he said sharply.

Mousse looked sheepish "these are pretty much all I own" he explained.

Konatsu sighed and towed the other boy to his extensive wardrobe and pulled out a black tux with a grey under vest and ascot "wear this, I bought it for my Fred and Ginger act" he explained.

"Which one were you?" Mousse asked.

Konatsu visibly puffed up "I was both at the same time; I'm that good"

Mousse had to admit that he looked good in the western style tux; it fitted his lithe, muscular frame very well and displayed his wide shoulders and slim waist to an advantage. With a sigh, he picked up the corsage that he'd bought for Ranma to match his boutonnière.

It was a gorgeous wedding; both grooms wore matching tuxedos and were obviously in love as they recited their simple, yet elegant vows. It was endearing how Kenji's voice shook a bit with emotions and how he accidently put the ring on Toshi's right hand. Although Mousse was happy for his friends, he felt a sense of disappointment. Okay his date was gorgeous and popular, but she was Ranma Saotome and not Shampoo. Mousse wondered if anyone would ever look at him the way his two friends were gazing at each other.

The reception was in a lavish ballroom and the wedding couple had spared no expense on food and entertainment. There was a sushi bar, a pasta bar, salad bar and antipasto bar to be consumed at people's leisure. The drinks were free flowing and the grooms kept on snagging champagne on the sly for Mousse and Ranma "it's ginger ale if anyone asks" they whispered to them. There was a harp player during cocktail hour on the terrace and then a wedding band for dancing. Ranma got a few tears when she sang their first dance for them 'Today I Met the Boy I'm going to Marry'.

Mousse was nursing his champagne and sat thinking at their table, he was reflecting that he was surrounded by loving couples but there was no one for him. He wondered if he'd just wasted thirteen years on someone who simply couldn't love him. 'What now?' he thought. A gorgeous woman sat beside him "having a good time Mousse?" a completely masculine voice asked. She was a little older looking with dark auburn hair twisted into a complex knot into back her head, a tasteful blue cocktail dress with a matching hand bag and a slim, curvy body.

He turned to her, she looked rather familiar "don't you recognize your own optometrist?" she questioned him.

"Mimi?" he asked incredulously.

She smiled "I told you I make a better woman than a man. Come on, a wedding is no place to brood. Let me introduce you to my wife" he said and did. She was a rather plain woman until she smiled, which she did a lot of. Mousse was introduced to every person at the wedding; there were all sorts of people there, gay, straight, bi, drag queens and something that he'd never encountered before; drag kings. These were a curiousity to him, they weren't like Ukyou who bound her breasts but still looked feminine. They not only bound their breasts, but glued hair to their faces and acted more masculine then any guy Mousse had ever met. Some of the more extreme members took testosterone to grow their facial hair for real, still everyone was charming and lots of people flirted with Mousse. Especially the guys "there's an entire tribe of people who look like you? Where is this again? My vacation is coming up"

Mousse could see why Ranma felt acceptance here; they asked few questions and being different didn't matter so much. Mousse was extremely flattered to be so heavily praised. He'd always felt rather plain compared to the other tribal members with their exotic coloured hair, his own black was so typically Asian. Yet to these people, his jewel toned eyes, tall stature and pale skin made him exotic as a peacock amongst chickens.

Ranma came up to him after she was done singing "this is the best wedding ever" she declared, a tad flushed from the champagne. She wore a beautiful red satin bubble cocktail dress with a black scarf belt and match shoes.

"I'm sure yours and Akane's will be just as nice" he teased, causing her to blush.

"And yours and Shampoo's" she countered, in her high spirits she failed to see Mousse frown. "Let's dance" she suggested.

"You want to dance with me?" Mousse said in surprise.

"I dance with you every night. Who will it hurt if we do it on a real dance floor?" she pointed out. "Besides, I saw you attacking the pasta bar, you need the exercise or you're going to get fat."

"Who are you calling fat? I saw you scarfing the sushi bar, I think that your butt has gained an inch tonight chubbo" Mousse said, she took his arm and playfully pretended to deck him. They dance a lot, fast songs, and slow songs and even were persuaded to do a couple of steps from the dance they were working on. Mousse lost track of time and said "it's almost midnight, I have to go home to get some sleep. I have to work tomorrow" he explained.

"Okay, I'll see you later Mousse" Ranma said wanting to stay to the end.

Mousse snuck up the stairs, trying not to giggle as he was tipsy from the champagne, when the light came on and Shampoo's eyes smoldered at him with rage.

"Where you been so long!" she demanded.

"I told you, I was at the wedding and it was going on until late tonight" he replied, wondering why she seemed so mad. "What's wrong?" he asked her.

"I get sick of it" she raged. "You never here and even when are here, you seem like million miles away. What go on with you Mousse?" she cried.

"Nothing" he lied, unable to tell her the truth. "I have a lot of play rehearsals"

"You should keep your mind on job and serving us properly" she snapped.

"That's all I ever think about, I love you Shampoo" he said desperately stepping forward to try and hold her. "You're my life, my reason for being"

He gasped when she punched him on the cheek as hard as she could, his head snapped back. He slowly shook it off and looked at her; there was no remorse in her expression, only rage. Something long dormant inside him snapped and he gripped her other hand as it came up to repeat the damage to the other side of his face.

All hopes inside him died as he said "never hit me again, I don't deserve your abuse and I never have. How can you blame me for having bad eyesight, or that your fiancé is a better martial artist than me? I'm not stupid and I'm not weak. Shampoo do you even like me?" he asked in a hurt tone of voice.

Shampoo was completely frozen in shock that Mousse was defying her for the first time in his life. She quickly thought about what to tell him and was tongue tied to be put on the spot like this. "Mousse I....." was all she could answer him.

She watched his entire body slump and then he gave a world weary sigh. "I thought not, I'm leaving here tonight and won't be back. Please tell Cologne that I quit" he said softly, striding purposefully to his room.

"Mousse you no leave" she cried after him. "Where you go?"

He turned around for a second and said "you've wanted me to go back to China since I got here. Where the hell do you think I'm going to go?"

"But you said you will always stay with Shampoo" she protested, suddenly realizing that he'd become so much a part of her life that he'd become necessary to her.

"I can't stay where I'm not wanted" he said slamming to door in her face and locking it.

"Mousse I'm sorry" she cried. Less then a minute later he came out holding a duffle bag and wearing his normal clothes. "Mousse" she cried again.

"I'll be back for the rest of my things in a few days, please don't throw them into the street. There are some very expensive weapons in there" he said coldly.

"Mousse, you no leave" she said again.

His shoulders slumped "I can't be a slave to a selfish, capricious woman for the rest of my life. I need a change; it's time for me to move on. Have a nice life Shampoo" he said, pushed past her and descended the stairs. He shut the door after him with a decisive bang as if fleeing from hell itself. Then reality set in, he had nowhere to go and probably only enough money in his savings account for a one way ticket to China. What was he going to do, return to his tribe and find another girl to slave over? Impulsively he pulled out his cell phone and dialed Ranma's number.

"Yo Mousse" the slightly tipsy martial artist said, he'd stopped at Konatsu's to change out of his dress and into his other form. If he was surprised that Mousse was calling him so late, he didn't seem it. "What's up?"

"I've left the Neko Hanten and anything to do with it" Mousse said with tears filling his eyes.

That stopped Ranma in his tracks "seriously? Even Shampoo?" he asked.

"Especially Shampoo" Mousse replied.

"Come over to the Tendos" Ranma ordered him.

"But I don't want to impose" Mousse protested dubiously.

Ranma made a rude noise "we've had half of Nerima crashing at some point; one more guest isn't going to kill us. I can't have you just wandering the streets" he said.

"Okay" Mousse said and turned the corner towards there, unaware that he was being followed. Shampoo wanted to see who the mystery girl was for once and for all. She was shocked when he stopped at the Tendo house. 'Perhaps he's seeing one of the other sisters?' she reasoned and climbed a tree to observe him.

"Over here Mousse" came a whisper and he walked into the yard to find Ranma dipping his feet in the Kio pond. "Come join me, the cool water feels nice on aching feet. I don't change if I just put my feet in" Ranma explained.

Mousse sat down on a rock and took off his shoes, he almost groaned a loud when he put his feet into the velvety water and then giggled when the kio started nibbling on his toes. Ranma noticed his bruised cheek and went inside for a cold compress. Shampoo felt like going to Mousse at his slumped, defeated looking posture. "Here put this on your cheek" he said, Mousse gratefully did.

"So what happened?" he asked.

"I finally gave up, she doesn't even like me. I'm going home" he stated.

"But you can't go home because of....you know" Ranma said glancing around.

"I can't stay here and have people walk all over me" he said. "I want to go back where I'm accepted and I have loved ones" he said.

"You're accepted here and people like you" Ranma offered. "Look this thing with Shampoo will sort itself out"

"No more, I'm no longer her cats-paw, nor will I play her games. I'm tired of it" he said wearily. "I don't want to fight you over something so stupid. Even if I did defeat you both, her love would never be mine"

"I never understood why you fought me at all, I've never wanted her. I kinda like her as a friend, but find her annoying as a fiancée. She's always groping me against my will" Ranma said. Shampoo's eyes filled with tears to hear the honest truth from him. "Is she always like that when she's in love?" Ranma asked.

"She isn't in love, she's acting like a woman obsessed and it's not over you. She's destined to become the more powerful leader ever and part of that includes that she has to obey every rule, including kiss of death or marriage. Her great-grandmother feeds her obsession and drives her to greater acts of desperation. She isn't acting like herself. The Xian Pu I knew was sweet and kind; she would always stand up for the weak and helpless. She had lots of friends and loved to get involved with community services. The Xian Pu that you know is little more then an automaton, she's friendless and alienates all of those around her. I've tried to protect her from herself and absorb her wanton violence as best I can, but I can't be her buffer anymore. Yet certain parts of the girl I loved remains. As an Amazon, it would be Shampoo's right to challenge Akane for you, yet she never has because she knows that Akane is no way as skilled as her. I ask that you take care of Shampoo when I'm gone" Mousse requested.

"You're not going anywhere. Come inside and sleep on it, we'll figure something out" Ranma said. Mousse trudge world wearily after him, he felt more beaten then he ever had before.

Shampoo still sat up in the tree lost in thought. Had she really changed that much, become cruel and indifferent? She tried to remember the last time that she and Mousse sat up together and had a cocoa night. Yes Mousse had been persistent pain her butt forever, but when did she start striking him? 'How many scars had she carved into his flesh and heart?' she wondered as her eyes filled with tears. Now she understood how Mousse felt, Ranma was gone, never had been hers in the first place and now she didn't even have a single friend.

Mousse lay on a futon in an unfamiliar place. He listened to the snores of Genma Saotome followed by the softer ones of his son. His tears ran silently down his cheeks to soak the soft pillow beneath his head. Oddly enough at the same moment he and Shampoo had exactly the same thought. 'What's to become of me?"


	6. Chapter 6

Neihaera-feeling a little better, but not up to usual hentai-ness yet. The "thing" isn't over, merely slowly improving despite our useless lawyer dragging her butt. Apparently, a few days equals a week and a half.

However, I did write a little item that was best served on adultfanfiction (dot) net that you might like. Check for the author imsadistic and look for the story, The Three Holes of Akane Tendo, its worth the read according to my other hentai writing pals. Dark Lemons for anyone else who might want to check it out.

Sid

"You're not leaving" Akane snarled at Mousse.

The Chinese martial artist's mouth was drawn into a thin line as Akane ranted at him, Ranma stood behind her to lend support. Ranma was somewhat in awe of Akane's maternal streak, it was a mile wide and she rarely ever allowed it to show. She certainly was now that she'd learned of what had transpired between Shampoo and Mousse and saw his swollen cheek.

"What good would it be for me to stay here? I have no money to support myself and no job to even provide you with rent money. I refuse to become yet another burdening freeloader on your household" Mousse snarled back, looking pointedly at Ranma when he said the freeloading part. Ranma had the sense to blush.

"What good would going back to China do you?" she asked.

"I can stay at my mother's house there" he said.

"Then you become a burden on her" Akane stated in a calmer voice.

"I can work on her farm in exchange for food and lodging, as well as take a job in the village" Mousse informed her. "I wouldn't even have to buy a plane ticket; I can ship my luggage and fly there to save on costs"

"What will you do for hot water to change back when you get there?" Akane challenged.

"My mother and sisters know about my curse, they're hardly going to have barbequed duck that night if a white duck with human intelligence shows up on their doorstep" he snapped back.

"Great and while you're there, do you intend to attach yourself to the first Amazon girl who pays the slightest attention to you and waste another thirteen years of your life in pursuit of her like you did Shampoo?" Akane asked.

Mousse opened his mouth to protest this and then just turned and left to fume beside the kio pond. He was troubled because what Akane had just said had hit too close to home. Is that why he had been drawn to Shampoo, because all of the other girls refused to have anything to do with him?

Ranma turned to Akane "I think you went a little far" he observed.

She sat down "he needs to think about what would be best for him. He's hurting and confused about who he's supposed to be right now. His only dream is dead and going back to his tribe with its screwed up society isn't going to help him" Akane said with a sigh.

"We can't tell him how to run his life" Ranma pointed out.

"If he was drowning would you throw him a life ring?" Akane asked.

"Of course" Ranma said sitting beside her.

"Well he is drowning in another way and it's up to us to save him" Akane declared, and then she blushed when she realized that Ranma was holding her hand. She looked at their entwined hands and realized how natural it felt to have his large, warm calloused palm in hers. She knew that she should probably remove her own small hand, but didn't want to, so she just ignored it. She shivered when Ranma's lips brushed her ear. "You're so cute when you get bossy Tomboy" he whispered to her.

She turned her head to look into his eyes, but accidently pressed her lips against his own. She flinched at the feeling of his silken, full lips. Ranma couldn't believe that he was touching Akane this way, expecting to be killed; he briefly ghosted a kiss against them. Akane didn't stop him, so he leaned forward and started kissing her softly, his heart beat faster when she kissed him back. She sighed to be receiving the soft, loving kiss that she'd always dreamed of from Ranma and brought her fingers to the nape of his neck to caress the soft hair under his braid. Ranma's fingers trembled when he reached back and undid his own braid, remembering how people always wanted to stroke Mousse's own long hair. Soon Akane was running her fingers through his dark locks while their kiss deepened. Their kiss turned hungry and Ranma parted Akane's lips with his tongue to explore the velvety depths of her mouth. Akane moaned as Ranma started stroking her taut nipples through her shirt and bra. Ranma wrenched himself back with effort. "Akane we have to stop" he said regretfully.

Akane's bosom was heaving "you're right Ranma, if our fathers caught us they would force us to marry"

Ranma reached back to re-braid his hair "that's not the reason, I want our first time to be on our wedding night" he explained.

Akane's eyes lit up, this was the first time that Ranma had ever voluntarily said anything about them getting married. "So you want to get married?" she asked, too nervous to ask if he wanted to marry her.

"Yes I do Akane" he said and then they shared a chaster kiss and scurried off to dwell separately on what had transpired. Both had forgotten about Mousse.

Mousse sat at the kio pond wondering what to do. Somehow the idea of China was becoming less and less appealing and he wasn't sure he could get a job to remain in Nerima. He only was here on an employment visa and didn't have a lot of skills or education to recommend himself to a potential employer. It would just be a matter of time before he was deported. He'd never told anyone the real reason for coming to Nerima and his reluctance to go back. When a male Amazon reaches the age of sixteen, he was expected to act as pleasure slave to whichever unmarried warrior wanted him. Should a child result from their copulations, they would be acknowledged as being fatherless until the warrior married and the child would automatically become his. Mousse couldn't do this; he'd sworn his virginity to Shampoo a long time ago nor could he forfeit a child of his blood. So he'd come to find Shampoo in hopes that she'd been the warrior who claimed him, only to find her wanting to claim another.

"Hi Mousse" someone said.

He looked up to see Dr. Tofu "hello Dr. Tofu?" he replied back politely, wishing he could just be left alone with his thoughts.

"Is Kasumi here?" he asked.

"No she's at the library" Mousse offered.

Dr. Tofu breathed a sigh of relief "that's good, I tend to get a little.....crazy around her and I need to talk to you" he said.

"What do you want with me?" Mousse asked.

"Kasumi told me about your predicament and I thought that I might be able to help. I'm in need of a new assistant and wondered if you might want the job" he said. "Your duties would consist of answering phone calls, scheduling appointments, general cleaning, autoclaving instruments when necessary, watering the plants, assisting the nurses etc. The base salary isn't great, but there semi are annual raises if you work out" Dr. Tofu said. He told Mousse his potential salary. Mousse was surprised, it was pretty generous considering.

"Why me?" he asked.

"You need a place to work and a place to stay, I can provide both" Dr. Tofu said.

"Where would I stay?" Mousse asked.

"I converted the upstairs of the clinic into four small one bedroom apartments. They are pretty tiny, but good for a single person or a couple and one of them is vacant. It's fully furnished and you could move in today if you want. I would hold back a portion of your pay cheque for rent" he explained. "Would you be interested? I can show it to you right now" he said persuasively.

"But you could get lots of people for this job" Mousse pointed out.

"Yes, but I like you and don't want you to have to run back to China with your tail between your legs. I'm trying to give you a choice, should you choose to accept my help" Dr. Tofu said having a seat beside the confused boy.

Mousse examined the kindly man beside him, his offer seemed too good to be true, but he knew him to be honourable. Dr. Tofu smiled back and stood up "before you decide, let me show you the hovel you'll be vacating." Dr. Tofu led him to the clinic, up a private entrance at the side of the building, and through a bright, clean hallway. He reached a red door that was uniform to the other three on each side , inserted a key and pushed it open. "Here we are. I'll warn you it's not Buckingham Palace, but it's yours if you decide to take it." Dr. Tofu said, he was right, it was a small place. They entered into a rather decent sized living room/kitchenette combination that was divided by a wall. The kitchen appliances weren't high end, but worked. There was a small wooden table with two chairs in the far corner. The furnishings for the living room were a comfortable looking blue loveseat and arm chair. Someone had built a window seat below the largest window. Off to the right was a small bedroom that contained a lacquered pine double bed and a matching small desk, dresser and bookcase. The closet was small but adequate for Mousse's needs. The toilet room was tiled in white and looked to be recently cleaned like the rest of the place. The same could be said of the shower (there wasn't room for an onsen). Mousse realized that when Dr. Tofu looked at this place, all he could see was an average apartment. What Mousse was seeing was that it could be a place of his own. It wasn't spectacular but it was bright, airy and clean. Not to mention that it would be close to his work. He could live here, he could invite guests over, he could have girls come here and no one would bother them. This thought gave him a nosebleed.

Dr. Tofu chuckled knowingly; quite certain what direction Mousse's thoughts were going in. "I take it you're interested?" he asked handing him a tissue.

"Yes very much so, but I still don't get why me?" Mousse replied feeling a little overwhelmed.

"Us girls have to stick together" Dr. Tofu replied.

A light bulb went off in his head "you don't mean that you're a drag queen?" he asked.

"Yep, it took me years to realize it. I don't go in for stage performances, I'm into fetish. I go to fetish nights as Mistress Demonica. She wears a Faith Hill wig, thigh high lace up leather boots and a leather cat suit or corset and mini skirt. She's well known for her lashes and I don't mean the ones on her face. She's the mistress of the bullwhip and can snatch a cigarette out of someone's mouth without a scratch. She also teaches SM 101 classes on proper sterilization of equipment and how to play safely" Dr. Tofu admitted.

"So you know about Ranma and myself?" Mousse asked.

"Small scene, new virgins don't remain a secret for long" Dr. Tofu said. "Now that I've trusted you with my secret, do we have a deal?" he asked holding out the key.

"What secret?" Mousse asked taking it from him.

"That's the spirit" he said approvingly. "The clinic closes at six and I leave at seven after completing my paperwork for the day. You boys can practice to your heart's content, but keep the music low. Miss Yamada lives beside you, she's a school teacher. Mr. Toyohashi lives across the hall, he's a banker. The final unit is rented to a young couple, Mr. and Mrs. Honda. I have some old plates, cutlery and pots and pans you can have, not to mention old sheets for your bed if you'll accept them. I also have a TV that I never use, its nothing special, but it works. Cable and utilities are included in the rent" he said. "I have a commercial washer and dryer in the basement that I use for wash patient's gowns and bedding. You can use that off hours, but don't tell your neighbours that I'm letting you do it. Just make sure that you don't wash any of the medical clothes with yours" he said conspiratorially. Mousse tried not to laugh; he was actually whispered that part as if the other tenants could hear him. "How does that sound?" he asked.

"Wonderful, I'll take the job and the apartment" he said.

"Good, feel free to paint, but light colours please" Dr. Tofu requested.

"Of course" Mousse assured him.

"Great, you can start the day after tomorrow to give you a day to settle in. However I need you to come with me in the morning to get your work visa transferred to my name. I'll meet you here at eight" he said exiting the place.

Mousse walked through the place over and over again. He touched everything that he encountered and discovered that the loveseat was a pullout couch, perfect for overnight guests. Finally he flung himself on the bed and sighed. He finally had a place of his own. He was home!

Shampoo could only stare out her window while Mousse talked to Cologne when he came to get his stuff. She couldn't bear facing him after she'd made such a fool of herself. He seemed to be in good spirits and even caused her great-grandmother to laugh. She'd been mildly shocked that Dr. Tofu and Ranma were assisting in the move. Mousse glanced up once and she ducked so that he wouldn't see her. She was surprised when he seemed disappointed by this. He left after giving Cologne a quick hug, this surprised Shampoo.

She went downstairs, "what that about?" she asked her great-grandmother.

"It seems that Mousse isn't going to China after all, Dr. Tofu gave him a job and a place to stay. Looks like he's out of our hair and won't disturb you and your airen anymore"

"No want Ranma" she said reflecting on the night before.

"You are under kiss of marriage still, you have to" Cologne said sternly.

"Then find way for me to get out of it. Marrying him is no longer an option" Shampoo said with a glare, all she could think about was Mousse. Cologne blinked in surprise that Shampoo was defying her, she never had before.

Mousse and Ranma were painting his place and he looked quite the sight. He had his long hair pulled back in a ponytail and wore a baseball cap backwards to protect it. Both he and Ranma wore gis that they had rescued before Kasumi could throw them out. Mousse carefully spread the subtle off-grey that he'd chosen over the walls and looked pointedly at his painting buddy, who lay on the slip covered couch and seemed to be surfing the web on his cell phone. "You know Ranma, when I volunteered to pay for pizza and soft drinks if you would help me paint; I actually was expecting you to help me" he pointed out.

"I don't know why you bothered picking an off-grey to cover white; there isn't much of a difference. Why bother to paint at all?" Ranma complained.

"I like the subtle different, its more soothing then white" Mousse replied. "Now come grab a brush so we can finish this tonight so I can move in tomorrow"

"Just a sec" Ranma said and then whooped with triumph. "Found it! What do you think of this ring?" he asked holding the screen towards Mousse.

Mousse looked at the ebay site and noted the small white gold ring with the tasteful princess cut diamond. "Sorry Ranma, I still don't like men" Mousse joked.

Ranma rolled his eyes "not for you, idiot, I want to buy it for Akane. I'm going to ask her to marry me"


	7. Chapter 7

Eyes watched as the tall Amazon walked through the crowded streets. "I'm just making sure that's he okay" Shampoo told herself, not wanting to admit that she'd been stalking him since he'd left the Neko Hanten. He looked good, he wore western clothes today, black jeans and a green long sleeved t-shirt that allowed his sculpted torso to show. Sunglasses protected his eyes from the bright sunlight. He drew many an admiring glance from girls as he strode purposely on his way, not that he noticed their interest. He carried a shopping basket which was full of fresh vegetables, meat and a couple of house plants. She remembered how they used to shop together every Saturday as he was now; Mousse had a knack for finding the freshest vegetable and bargaining for prices. She found him a nuisance at the time, now she missed those days. Here she was following him around in disguise. She wore a chin length black wig over her own luxurious purple hair, sunglasses and a tan overcoat.

Mousse couldn't get over the feeling that he was being watched 'I'm being paranoid' he thought and glanced around, no one seemed to be paying the slightest attention to him. Which was good because he felt uncomfortable wearing the western style clothes that Konatsu had insisted he try in an effort to get himself used to being sexy. He felt anything but, although the jeans were relaxed fit, he felt that they hugged his rear too provocatively and exposed his 'goodies' in front too much. The shirt was so tight that he felt he might as well not being wearing one. He was happy when he arrived at the clinic and let himself into his apartment, 'home' he thought fondly. He'd personalized the space to suit his own tastes. The love seat had coloured Chinese brocade pillows added to it. A coffee table had been purchased at a thrifty shop that was painted a dark grey and had a creamy marble top. The walls were hung with prints that he had found at the same shop. He had house plants lined up on the window sills, except for in the kitchen where he'd gotten Dr. Tofu's permission to install a window box to grow his favourite herbs in.

In his bedroom he had put the quilt that his mother had made for him. She had made it about his life; there was a square from the baby blanket that he used to carry around with him. There were squares from clothes that he'd outgrown. His favourite one was taken from his Hidden Weapons novice robe (red with a white cloth belt) and finally his mother had managed to get a hold of an old robe of Shampoo's and sew it to all the rest. Mousse had opened that one and tucked a few hairs that he'd gotten from her hairbrush inside and resewed it. Over his bed, he had a framed poster of a falcon in flight. He'd always identified with birds and to him this poster represented freedom, his own. He missed Shampoo horribly but knew that it was for the best. He liked his new life; he was good at his job and got along well with his employer. He had thought that he would be bored being an assistant, but he enjoyed working with Dr. Tofu and was learning a lot about the human body.

He looked out the window, still feeling that he was being watched, he could have sworn that he saw a dark haired woman that he'd seen before ducking out of sight. Then he laughed at his paranoia, as if anyone would be stalking him he mused as he pulled out the ingredients to make dinner with. They were having practice at his place, so he was making supper for the 'girls'

"The Can Can" Konatsu proclaimed "that's the dance that's going to get you the crown"

Mousse looked dubious at this "hasn't that been done to death?" he asked.

"It's a classic, besides the real can can is going to look tame by the time I'm through with you" Konatsu said. "We're going to sex it up a lot and really show them why they call her Raunchy Ranko" he said nodding to Ranma.

"It could work, there's nothing like girls in matching costumes moving in perfect sync" Ranma observed. None of the boys were in costume that night (expect for Konatsu who normally wore girl's clothes) but all of them wore stilettos. Konatsu had taken over making dinner while Mousse and Ranma were practicing.

"Why spaghetti? I was expecting Chinese food" Konatsu asked.

"I got a little sick of Chinese while working at the Neko Hanten" Mousse explained and swung Ranma around and dipped her.

"Very good, now Ranma hook your leg around him and let him lift you" Konatsu said.

"Do I have to? That always gets him excited" Ranma said distastefully.

"Not my fault you actually become a real girl. A real short one at that" said.

"I'm not that short" Ranma protested.

"You're even smaller than Akane, you don't even come up to my collarbone" Mousse joked.

"Not everyone was born an Amazon" she said hotly.

"Nope, some people are runty girls" Mousse joked. "So which one of you are going to carry your children, you or Akane?"

"Well obviously Akane, I would have to be male to make babies" Ranma said.

"I don't know, perhaps you could make the deposit while male and than Akane could use a turkey baster to impregnate your female self?" Mousse suggested.

That got Konatsu's attention "What a concept, could you really be both mother and father to your own child?"

Ranma looked sick at the idea "you people are perverts!" she snapped. Than there was a knock at the door and they went to answer it.

Shampoo was wondering what at the hell was happening in Mousse's apartment, she was still convinced that he had a secret girlfriend and was watching his place through a high power telescope that she used to use to spy on Ranma. She'd watched while two girls were admitted to his apartment, but couldn't make out who they were because his blinds were mostly closed. She could see figures dancing and didn't know what to make of that. Her jaw dropped when a tall blonde knocked at the door and was admitted.

"Hi Dr. To-Mistress Demonica Mousse said admiring what a pretty woman she made. She wore a teased blonde wig, a tight leather studded corset, a zip up leather mini skirt and her long legs were encased in fish net stockings and knee high boots with killer stilettos. Her make up was dramatic and her bullwhip was coiled on her right hip.

"Hello everyone, I'm heading out to the Masquerade tonight, but can stay for dinner" Dr. Tofu said and joined their little party.

Shampoo was incensed, 'three girls?' she questioned. Mousse had never even looked at another girl with he lived with her at the Neko Hanten and now he was having orgies! She sighed and started walking home; she wondered why she couldn't get Mousse out of her head. So many years spent tripping over him, only to follow him when he was gone. She had given up on Ranma, it was like someone had ripped the blinders from her eyes and she was seeing clearer than she had in over a year. Ranma didn't love her; he barely even liked her and hated her glomping onto him. She had thought that she was being so sexy doing this, when all it did was annoyed him. It was Akane that he liked and she hadn't even realized this even when they were always together and she was the one who he rescued, not Shampoo. So she had started leaving him alone even when he came in for Ramen, now she was polite to him and not pushy. It was Mousse that she couldn't stop thinking about, she missed him. Why hadn't she realized that she would? She'd always had a bit of a soft spot for him. She sighed and continued home unaware that Mousse's orgy consisted of only one real girl, and she was far too busy pigging out on spaghetti to think about sex.

Mousse was surprised when he got a phone call from Mimi "Hi Mousse, my niece is in town and I was wondering if you would mind spending some time with her? She doesn't really know anyone here" he said.

"I don't know if I'm the man for the job" Mousse said dubiously.

"You're a nice boy and will treat Hortense well" he predicted.

"Hortense?" Mousse asked.

"Old family name, she was named after her great-grandmother" Mimi explained.

"What's she like?" he asked.

"She got a really nice personality" Mimi joked. "She's a pretty girl a bit older than you, she speaks passable Japanese and only wants to have a good time with a boy of her age. Her old Uncle bores her to death, just say that you'll take her to a movie and I'll spring for the entire date" he said persuasive.

Mousse pondered this; he'd never been on a real date before and wondered if he could use it from practice. His only experience going out with a woman consisted of going shopping with Shampoo where he'd spend all of his money on gifts for her that she never wore. It had hurt him that she snubbed his innocent presents, they were bought just to show her how special she was to him and not intended as a bribe. This strengthened his resolve, he had to start dating sometime and meeting other women. "Okay I'll do it?" he said decisively.

Mousse was nervous and shaved for the second time that day, washed his face, combed his hair, brushed his teeth and pulled open his closet to see what he should wear that night. He had to smile at the sparkly dresses hung beside his own white robes. He opened his dresser and looked at the western clothes there, wondering if he should resort to wearing those. He'd gotten quite the number of compliments since altering his mode of dress; finally he settled for a set of clothes that Ranma had talked him into buying. They were still Chinese and more the style that Ranma preferred to wear, but fit Mousse well. It was a plain black sleeveless shirt with a red stripe across one side, with black cording around the shoulders and baggy pants. The tight shirt showed off his impressive, lithe torso and exposed his powerful arms; he wore his regular baggie pants underneath.

Hortense was twenty; he had no idea why she would want to go out with someone that probably seemed like a kid to her. He hoped she wasn't too disappointed when he showed up. He knocked on the door of Mimi/Stan's house. He froze when the door was opened by a demurely dressed version of an America actress that he 'admired' late at night alone in his room, Megan Fox only Hortense had red hair.

Hortense couldn't believe her luck at the hunk that her boring Uncle had managed to scare up for her. She loved to party and loved to have sex; something she didn't normally get to do in Japan where she was watched like a hawk. "Hello you must be Mousse" she purred.

Mousse blushed at the way she was looking at him, she looked......hungry. He quickly dismissed it, perhaps she simply was.

"Hello Mousse", Stan said he was relieved that his nieces as going out with the shy virgin, he'd heard stories about her reputation and was determined that he keep her out of trouble while she was on his watch.

"Goodnight Uncle Stan" she said over her shoulder as she dragged Mousse off.

"Do you want to go see a movie?" Mousse asked.

"Do you have a place of your own?" she demanded.

"I have an apartment close by" he said cautiously, not appreciating how demanding a virtual stranger was being.

"Good lets go there" she said.

"Well there was a movie on TV that I wouldn't mind watching" Mousse said reluctantly.

She could only roll her eyes, 'was this guy for real?' she questioned.

"I thought that we'd do something more fun than that" she said with a wolfish grin, she sighed when he just gave her a confused look. As soon as they entered his apartment, she borrowed his washroom and changed into the outfit that she'd brought. Mousse's jaw dropped when she emerged wearing a red crop top that exposed her taut belly and an ultra low rise black mini-skirt.

"That's better" she said with satisfaction as Mousse's eye bugged out of his head. Swaying her hips, she joined him on the loveseat and draped her legs over his, allowing her black lace panties to show. Mousse gulped at this. She moved her foot so that it rested on his crotch and rubbed it suggestively.

Mousse realized what was happening and quickly stood up with his face flaming, "would you like some cocoa?" he squeaked nervously. He'd never been propositioned like this and didn't know how to react.

She snorted "I think that it's pretty obvious what I want, I want to screw you" she said. Mousse regarded her; he could rid himself of his virginity tonight he realized. He imagined pounding his frustrations into her beautiful body, and then he realized that he couldn't. By doing this, he would be no better off then in his village and being prey to any warrior who compelled him. He realized that his virginity was sacred to him and only to be bestowed to a woman he loved, not to be ordered from him. It was then that he had his epiphany, that he was no worse or better than anyone and was a person who should be valued and respected. He didn't want to sleep with this person; he didn't even like her.

Meanwhile

Ranma and Konatsu had gotten together to share some take out and discuss costuming.

"Where's Mousse tonight?" Konatsu asked.

"He's taking Mimi's niece out. Mimi asked him to. She's got a funny name, Harriet or something like that" Ranma said dismissively. He glanced up curiously when he heard Konatsu's chopsticks clatter to the table.

"Is her name Hortense?" he asked.

"Yes that's it" Ranma said.

"Mousse's going out with Horny Hortense? We have to go rescue him right now" Konatsu said urgently.

"Why should we?" Ranma asked curiously.

"She's a nympho who will eat him alive. There's no way that stick-in-the-mud could handle her" Konatsu said.

"I'm sure that he'll turn her down if he feels uncomfortable" Ranma said.

"No one turns Horny Hortense down, I certainly didn't the last time she was here" Konatsu said and both of them sped towards Mousse's apartment.

"That's not going to happen" Mousse said firmly. "I'm taking you back to your uncle's place"

"Do you know who I am and what I'm offering you? What are you some sort of fag?" she demanded in outrage.

"You're another woman who thinks she can tell me what to do. I've had enough of that in the past, not interested" he proclaimed and felt good about himself for defying women unlike his upbringing had dictated.

"You son of a bitch! Who the hell do you think you are?" she cried.

"I think I'm Mu Tzu and I refuse to take crap from women anymore" he said. Than there was a knock at the door, he answered it. Konatsu and Ranma strode in.

"Konatsu!" Hortense cried happily and ran into his arms.

"Good to see you again baby. Ready to come home with me so I can rock your world? Mousse Woussey here just got out of a bad relationship and isn't ready for a woman like you" Konatsu said.

"Oh is that why you turned me down?" Hortense said comprehension dawning. "Sorry I thought you were gay" she apologized.

Konatsu looked at him sharply "you turned Hortense down? No one does that!' he said startled.

"You're beautiful, but you're not the girl for me" Mousse said to her.

"It's okay, you're handsome too but I like Konatsu better" she said and led the cross dressing artist out the door.

"See? girls love cross dressers" he said before he departed. "If I don't make rehearsal tomorrow, don't come looking for me" he instructed them.

"I can't wait to get laid" Ranma said looking after them.

Mousse glanced after the amorous couple and said "I know that I can" he said with triumph.


	8. Chapter 8

The Day before the Pageant

"Do I have to?" Mousse protested again.

"We have to know if you can pass as a woman; this is the most obvious way" Konatsu said and adjusted Mousse's collar again. "You certainly can" he said pushing him in front of the mirror. All three of them studied him. They had decided that Mousse's first venture into regular society in full drag would be as a businesswoman because they were so common that people rarely even registered them. He was tall for a woman in black flats, but some women were tall. He wore a black suit with a skirt that terminated just above his black pantyhose clad knees. Underneath the tailored jacket he wore a high neck blue satin blouse. Konatsu had applied his make up lightly and put his hair back in tight, corporate bun. Mousse carried a black purse and wore small clip-on hoop earrings. The result was more than believable with the proper under padding. He looked not only passable, but downright beautiful.

Ranma looked at his friend in approval "are you ready?" he asked him. "You look sensational. If I didn't know you were a guy, I would ask you on a date" he said smiling wolfishly at him.

"But we know I am" Mousse said batting him lightly with his purse in a playful manner.

"Okay girlfriend, you're ready. All you need to do is go out for an hour by yourself and see if anyone notices anything" Konatsu said and gave him a slight shove towards the door.

"Don't make me do this" Mousse pleaded.

"We all have to do this; it's a rite of passage. Now go" he ordered.

Shampoo was hiding around the corner, waiting for Mousse to leave his place so that she could see where he was going. She intended to get to the bottom of his strange behaviour and large amount of girlfriends for once and for all. She registered the slightly nervous looking businesswoman leaving his building, but didn't really spare a thought for her other then observing that she was tall. 'Where was Mousse?' she wondered as the other woman walked in the direction of the park.

Mousse's face was flaming as he made his way through the streets of Nerima in full drag. He expected any second for someone to notice and publically announce what a freak he was. However no one seem to spare him a glance, so he calmed down and started imitating the purposeful walk that other women dressed like him were doing. He went into the park and sat on a bench to be less obvious, not noticing that his beauty was attracting the attention of eligible males. He stood up and took a lesser used path to stroll by the lake. "Hey Baby" a rough looking male said with a leer, happy to find such an attractive woman by herself. He'd been hoping to have a little fun today and now he could. He seized her arm and tried to drag her into the bushes. "Let's get better acquainted" he suggested. He was shocked when she wrenched her arm back from him.

"I don't think so" Mousse said in his most feminine voice, the guy was creeping him out but Konatsu had taught him never break character under any circumstances.

Not to be deterred, he tried to seize the tall beauty again "come on, you wouldn't be walking here alone if you didn't want some action" he said, shocked at how muscular her arm was.

"I'm not interested; I just wanted to be alone for a while. Leave me now or suffer the consequences" Mousse as Shampoo said, taking his arm back from the pervert.

"That's it, I tried to be nice. I guess that I'll just have to take what I want from you by force" he said, he flipped out a switch blade and advanced on her.

"Bring it" she said in a surprisingly masculine voice that caused him to freeze. Out of no where a whole bunch of chains exploded to tie the pervert up while a bowling ball knocked him unconscious. Mousse straightened his clothes and picked up his cell phone to call the police to tell them where to find the suspected rapist and left the park with a spring in his step. He'd more than passed!

"Hey gorgeous, where you going?" a familiar voice said.

"Ranma how come you didn't help me with that guy?" Mousse asked.

"I knew that you could handle him and it was amusing that he thought you were a helpless female" Ranma explained with a laugh that proved to be infectious. "Come on, lets go get you a sundae, pretty girl" he suggested.

"Why not" Mousse agreed. "Haven't we been here before?" Mousse asked.

"Yep, it's the nicest place in town" Ranma said. "Order a sundae, you're a girl so you can" he urged.

"I'll have a hot fudge sundae with cherry ice cream" Mousse said.

"She'll have extra sprinkles, extra whipped cream and lots of cherries. Right Sweetie?" Ranma said in a mushy tone of voice.

Mousse blushed at this "that'll be fine" he muttered and handed the menu back to the waiter. He was shocked when him asking for his cheque was met with "it's on the house because you're so cute" the waiter said.

Mousse beamed at Ranma and said in a high, excited voice "gosh thanks mister!"

Ranma and Akane

Akane and Ranma were kissing heavily in her bed; they were alone for once and were taking advantage of the fact. They were riding a fine edge between innocent kissing and heavy petting. Akane didn't object when Ranma took her top off, he moaned when she nibbled the sensitive place on his neck that she'd discovered. She grinned at him wickedly and ground herself against him, eliciting another moan from him.

"Akane you don't play fair. How am supposed to wait for our wedding night if you're going to tease me like this?" Ranma complained, but ground back into her softness.

"Why wait?" she asked and started to undo his pants as he top was already off.

"I promised you" he protested.

"I already know that we're going to get married, but that could be years from now. I love you and want us to make love together" she said.

"But Akane?" he protested, but surrendered to their mutual desires when she pulled out the pack of condoms that she'd purchased. It was awkward at first when they..... LEMON (A/N sorry I'm the first one to love writing lemons, but in keeping with the PG-13 rating I've given this story, I have to self censor)

Afterwards they cuddled "that was amazing" Akane said, she was cutely flushed and her hair messy, Ranma thought she'd never looked so sexy. 'She's mine' he thought happily. "Want to go on a date tomorrow?" she asked.

Ranma frowned at this "I promised Mousse that I'd run lines with him for his play" Ranma said. That night was the Miss U-Haul contest, but he didn't want to tell Akane that. "How about the next night?" he asked.

"Sure, that would be great" she said.

"I'd better get out of here before we're caught" Ranma said, Akane happily watched him dress and knew that he was now hers forever. She dressed herself. "I'll see you later" she whispered to him with a giggle as he gave her one final deep kiss.

"You got it girlie" he said with a crooked grin that only endeared him to her more. 'I'm in love' she thought as she stretched, she was a little sore in her girly parts, but it was so worth it. 'Mrs. Saotome' she thought dreamily as she picked up the phone and dialed a number. "Hello, I would like to confirm my reservation for a table at the Miss U-Haul contest tomorrow. Yes, it's just for one person" she said and then hung up with a self satisfied grin.

Miss U-Haul

Mousse was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of drag queens and how elaborate their costumes and props were "there's no way we're going to win" he said as he was helped into one of the can can costumes that they'd rented for the occasion by Konatsu.

"Don't sell yourselves short, you'll win for sure" he said.

Ranma came out wearing the other one, looking adorable as ever. Both had full updos with feathers in their hair and looked very authentic. "You look great Mousse" she gushed.

"So do you girlfriend" he grinned back at her.

"You're on next" Konatsu announced.

"I'm nervous" Mousse said.

"Just get out there and do everything I taught you" he said.

With butterflies in their stomachs, Ranma and Mousse took up their positions and waited for the curtain to open and 'Because we Can' to start.

Shampoo stood in front of the sign that read "Miss U-Haul Crowned Tonight" she frowned at this. She'd followed Ranma and Mousse and couldn't understand what they'd be doing here.

"Shampoo?" she heard someone calling her name.

She turned to see Akane in disguise; she wore a male school uniform and a newsie type hat. "Akane what you do here?" she asked her.

"I just came out to get some air during intermission, would you care to join me? I have a table" she said.

"I guess. What go on here?" Shampoo asked in confusion.

"It's time for you to learn the boys' secret" Akane said cryptically and bade someone get another chair for her table and ordered Shampoo a drink.

"What that?" she asked.

"Watch and learn" Akane said as the lights dimmed.

The curtains opened to reveal two girls in full can can costumes. Their song came on, they lifted up their skirts to reveal layers of colourful under lace embellishments and red drawers and started high kicking. Shampoo's jaw dropped when she identified the redhead to be the female Ranma, she glanced at Akane. She nodded back to her, knowing that Shampoo recognized who it was. Shampoo turned her attention to the other girl as both 'ladies' flipped up the back of their skirts to reveal drawer covered butts. They were amazing as they did a kick line, and then somersaulted in tandem from opposite sides of the stage. It was sexy and raunchy at the same time.

Then the taller one picked up redhead up and whirled her around airplane style, she then snaked around the brunette until she was wrapped around her waist. The brunette flung Ranma into the air, caught her and then placed her back onto the stage. She took a hold of Ranma's waist, with a single pull Ranma's skirt came off and she wore only her drawers and bodice. Shampoo kept on watching the brunette, the drag queen was very skilled she thought, and then the familiar features fell into place. "Mousse?" she said in surprise.

Akane nodded in confirmation "the boys have been busy" she said and continued to watch her fiancée. Mousse continued to flip Ranma around until she looked embarrassed to be stripped down to a g-string, leaving her female boobs uncovered. She kept on trying to cover herself with Mousse's flying skirts with hilarious results, until the entire audience was laughing. Finally they terminated their dance by both doing full double front splits.

"What that about?" Shampoo said in bewilderment.

"They'll explain" Akane said. She watched the rest of the acts and waited with bated breath as they announced the winner.

"This is unusual, but there are two winners tonight that did a double act. Not that many girls are unselfish enough to share the limelight, but let's give it up for Raunchy Ranko and Shampoo. They are the winners of Miss U-Haul1995" the MC announced and an ecstatic Mousse and Ranma went on stage. They hugged the other contestants and Mousse accepted the banner and oversized baskets of comps, while Ranma accepted the cheque and oversized tiara.

"Shampoo?" Shampoo repeated.

"Come on" Akane said and pulled off her hat.

"Where we go?" she asked as Akane led her to the security guard in front of the stage.

"Could you please tell Ranma and Mousse that their fiancées are here to see them?" she asked him sweetly.

The three drag queens were now in the private room that they had been assigned. "You won, I told you you would" and happy Konatsu said as he hugged Ranma. "Mousse you were wonderful too" he said hugging him in turn.

"Of course I am" he said, practically glowing at his accomplishment.

"I couldn't have done it without you" Ranma said. "Now I can pay Nabiki off and buy Akane her ring" he cried and kissed Mousse on the lips impulsively.

"Ranma that was my first kiss" he protested.

"Yes, it should have gone to me" a voice said, while another voice said "what ring?" The boys started guiltily apart and turned horror filled eyes on Shampoo and Akane.

"These girls said they were your fiancées" the security guard said with a shrug.

"I can explain", both boy cried at the same time.

Konatsu backed out of the room "sorry, no concern of mine" he said cheerfully and escaped.

Akane walked over to Ranma "it's okay; I've known about your....unique job for a while now and love watching you perform. Nabiki told me when I wondered if you were cheating on me when you went out, so I started following you. I thought that it was kind of weird at first and then I realized how great you were and came to watch you. I love that this has made you accept both halves of yourself, I'm going to marry you regardless of whether you find a cure or not and wanted you to embrace your uniqueness. There's nothing shameful about it. I love you in either form because you're still you" Akane said.

"Really?" Ranma said.

"Absolutely, do you mind if you keep on performing for a while? I've grown addicted to watching you" Akane admitted chagrined.

"I'm marrying a pervert" Ranma said putting her arms around Akane. She was annoyed when Shampoo butted in.

"Ranma, as you officially engaged to other girl, kiss of marriage over. I sorry I kept glomping on you when you no like it and hurting you Akane. I congratulate on upcoming marriage and hope we can be friends" Shampoo said and then turned to the still frozen Mousse. "Can I have few minutes alone with Mousse?" she requested.

"Of course" Ranma said and then drew Akane out.

Mousse regarded her with wary eyes, he felt so ashamed that she'd witnessed his downfall from manhood. "Mousse why didn't you tell me about this?" she asked in Mandarin, indicating his costume.

"I promised Ranma that I wouldn't. Shampoo, I never intended for you to find out about this. It started out with my wanting the prize money to buy you nice things and than I got involved in the community and liked the people I met" he said. "I guess you think I'm a sick fag or something" he said hanging his head. He was surprised when she caught his head in her hands and gave him a hungry kiss.

"Shampoo, why?" he asked in shock.

"I always thought the cross dressers in our tribe were sexy. Mousse you look amazing!" she said taking his hands and squeezing them.

"I have to dress like a girl to turn you on?" he asked with a heavy heart.

"No, I love the male you a lot better, but won't object if you wear something frilly to bed for me once in a while" she said.

"To bed?" he asked.

"Once we're married Airen" she said. "I love you" she admitted to herself and him.

"Oh Shampoo" he said and kissed her deeply.

"I fell in love with you a long time ago, but my great-grandmother said that I had to give you up. So I did because it was my duty, but the hurt twisted in my heart and I became violent towards you out of frustration. I'm so sorry" she said. "Mousse can we go home?" she asked.

"Of course, just let me change" he said. "Shampoo, I love you too" he added with a happy smile.

"I know" she said giving him her sweetest smile, this almost broke his heart. He expected her to take him to the Neko Hanten, but was surprise when she clung to his arm as she led him to his apartment. He wordless opened the door.

"I like your place, its so you" she said viewing it up close for the first time. It was cozy and felt like home to her because it was his.

"Shampoo I don't know what the future's going to bring. Dr. Tofu's making me take night school to finish off my high school and has suggested that he can get me a scholarship to become a chiropractor"

"Whatever happens, we'll do it together" she said and started to undo his robe.

He bit his lip in nervousness. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"I would like us to make love" she said. He liked that she didn't order this, but requested.

"If we make love, than I could never leave you" he said hesitantly.

"I don't want you to" she said.

"But about your great-grandmother? She'll never let us be together" he pointed out as she eased his robe off and stroked his chest.

"She will have to when I refuse to come back to the Neko Hanten and work as a waitress. It will be even more convincing when I threaten to give up my claim to leadership. I'm staying right here with you until she gives us permission to marry" Shampoo said and caught his lips with her own. "Nothing like the threat of her great-great-grandchildren being conceived out of wedlock to bring her around" she said. "Now please make love to me?"

Mousse scooped her up and took her to the bedroom, where they made ardent love as only two Amazons can.

Two Years Later

"I told you that curls would work for you", Shampoo exclaimed putting her curling iron aside, her wedding ring flashed her finger. Mousse examined himself in the mirror and fluffed his hair; this caused his own ring to sparkle. "You don't think that the purple eye shadow it too dark and makes me look cheap?" he questioned.

"I think you look beautiful" his wife said, depositing a kiss on top of his head. "Now if you win, I'll do whatever you want me to in the bedroom" she said.

"What if I don't?" he teased.

"Than I'll do it anyway" she answered with a grin.

"Akane, I look stupid in diamond tights" Ranma complained.

"Tough, I like them. Now get your cute buns out there and win" Akane said patting Ranma's full buttocks affectionately.

"Give me back my ring" she said.

Akane put her other hand over her pretty, but modest diamond ring "nope sorry, it's mine" she said. "Come on Shampoo let's go to our table" Akane suggested.

"Sounds good, good luck gals" Shampoo said and left with Akane.

Ranma grinned at Mousse, "you ready?" she asked him.

"Always, us girls have to stick together" the chiropractic student said. He and his wife still lived in Nerima and above the clinic he worked at part-time. Cologne had allowed them to marry when Shampoo promised to succeed her as leader on her deathbed. Cologne had seen two hundred years and is expected to see two hundred more.

Story is now 100% complete, Finished, Done like Dinner etc. Sorry, no amount of story alerts shall revive it.

Hope you liked it,

Sid


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